Healing. This a word with a lot of meaning. In that one word we can feel the pain of the wound, the strength it takes to keep going, the seemingly endless journey to wholeness and so much more. Often we ask why it must take so long for our ‘unseen’ wounds to heal. Wounds such as those received from hurtful words, betrayals or abuse, seem to have an extensive, if not infinite, healing time.
When we compare these types of wounds with those such as a cut or a scrape, we wish it were that easy; if only we could put on a Band-Aid and wait a few days and call it good! But these wounds aren’t just superficial. Wounds like these are deep. Their effects have penetrated deep into our core. Infection has spread to other areas of our lives, and unfortunately it’s not just something that will go away with time and hiding it beneath a bandage. These wounds carry shrapnel that must be removed before healing can truly begin. These shrapnel pieces are things like lies, unforgiveness, self-hatred and shame. And unless they are removed, wholeness cannot be achieved.
Maybe you’ve tried to remove them yourselves. Seeing your shame and self-hatred, you read some books on how to overcome them and try really hard to think more positively about yourself. You try to believe the good things others say about you. But time and time again you fail. Things can seem hopeless. You go back to hiding the pain and the shame, praying it will just go away on its own. But it never does.
There is good news! Whilst you may not be able to remove these shards of betrayal, abuse and pain inflicted upon you, I know One who can. His name is Jesus. He is a skilled surgeon who can reach into the deepest darkest areas with fine precision and remove those lies that remain inside. The Bible says, speaking of Jesus; “He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners,” (Isaiah 61:1). Healing our pain and brokenness, bringing us out from the darkness and giving us freedom is why Jesus came, died on a cross and rose again! It was for you and me so that we might be free. Galatians 5 says “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free”.
However, whilst His hands are tender and loving, His instruments are sharp. There is pain in the healing. For it to occur we must be vulnerable and open with Him about our lives and willing to let Him in.
We also must be willing to be healed. This may seem like an obvious choice; of course we want to be healed! But when you have had this wound for most of your life, pain and emotional turmoil is so familiar to you. You can’t imagine what it is like to live without this shadow of your past. You can’t imagine freedom and the unknown is frightening. To be truly healed is to step out into a place you have never experienced before. All of your familiar habits and feelings will be gone. In their place is freedom, joy and peace. It seems so unimaginable, so distant and practically impossible that surely it’s better to just stay where you are? Surely it’s easier to keep pressing on and ignoring the wounds? It may be easier, but it is not better.
In the Gospel of Mark we see a scene of Jesus both forgiving the sins of a man and healing his paralysis. It says: "I say to you, get up, pick up your pallet and go home." (Mark 2:11) The man's response was to immediately get up and walk home. Now imagine if his response had been otherwise. Imagine if he had replied, "But I've been paralyzed for so long, I don't remember what it's like to walk. What would I do if I could walk? It's scary, I'm much more comfortable here on my mat." It may have been easier, but anyone could see that it would not have been better. In healing there is freedom.
Once you have decided to let Jesus into those hurting areas of your life and let the healing begin, the journey does not stop there. It is more of a marathon than a sprint. There will be days where you feel like you can’t go on, that if you let God bring the pain to the surface one more time, you’ll break apart. However we have a promise from our Heavenly Father, a promise I can testify to, that "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9). He promises to be with us, He promises to sustain us and not let us fall; “God is within her, she will not fall;” (Psalm 46:5). There will also be days where you, by God’s grace, have conquered one of the mountains in the healing journey! Praise God! You are to rejoice in every step of healing! Don’t look ahead to how far you still have to go. Instead, look back and see how far you have come!
Finally, there may be times where you feel you are back at the beginning of your healing journey. As if after all this time you have gotten nowhere. However, this is not true. Paul says in one of his letters: “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6). God is not going to give up on you. He will continue to lead you down the path of healing if you will let Him. I have often struggled with this very feeling and a friend recently helped my perspective by way of an analogy. Picture a threaded screw. As you trace the path around the screw you continually circle back to where you began, but not exactly where you began, each venture around the screw moves you up just a millimeter. So even though it may feel like you have gone back to where you started, over time you will realize just how far you have come!
I encourage you, whose heart is hurting, to let the kind Savior in and let the healing begin!
The retreat format provides an opportunity for survivors to step back from their busy lives and take some much needed time to seek God's healing for the wounds they have carried for so long. The retreat will be led by members of the TriHOPe team and will explore several topics, including sharing stories, releasing shame, and healing through God's love and ministering to others. With both of the retreat leaders coming from backgrounds of sexual assault, they understand many of the emotional difficulties and the courage that is involved in participating in such a group and are prepared to walk alongside group members in the difficult, but freeing, journey of restoration that will take place over the course of the retreat.
